Vinn's Journal
5/1/2007 |
Centered in this heart of a soul in motion is awareness, a remembrance of how the everyday dance is danced.
At times, the whole of this life seems continually clumsy; I nonetheless have a stake in the ferocious focus of a life purpose.
How daunting! How arduous! How futile!
As I ponder my next move, life presses onward. It awaits no one and declares indifference to any pleas for tolerance and appreciation.
While I make my escape to the exiles of personal manner and style; the whole of my desire to serve community continues to abate.
Relentless struggles ensue between personal good and a collective awareness of shared prosperity.
She mentions repeatedly from her pulpit that there is no private good. I believe her.
I suspect what follows is that there is, also, no private pain. Whatever low, disconnect, and separate thoughts and feelings move through me, also have moved through you.
I take solace in the unity of all things and I hanker to exist from that grace space.
Returning home I am filled with ease and eagerness while scrubbing dishes, sweeping floors, and putting things away. There is discovered in these mundane repetitions a peaceful purpose and tranquil meander. It shows itself as full and even breaths. It reveals a pliant musculature, especially through the neck and shoulders. It demonstrates a circular focus that softly views everything equally. No prioritizing or ranking according to where I place my attention and how I take action.
What is important is the import of what is.
On morning walks, I view the neighboring flower beds with its blast of color and scent as miracle markers indicating the rightness of this movement moment. Just this will suffice.
Gone, for the moment, are the scheduling stressors which bind and blind me to the suitability of this movement moment. It is enough. I am enough!
I tire now of the countless tasks which I invent to fool myself into believing I have some importance and that my actions carry meaning.
Increasingly I deem how the actions of the everyday can become sacred and segue into solid ground and secure space.
I shout out to no thing in particular and demand of life a comeback.
"Give me peace". "Give me quiet." "Give me respite." "Give me grace."
"Show me the way to stop." "Show me the way to look." "Show me the way to listen."
I lie still and hold silence, I hear the whispers of life through the blasts of color and scent as it informs, "you are peace, you are grace, and you are the way."
I mark the number and quality of events and scheduled activities that provide me an atmosphere of comfort, and that exude a quality of relaxed calm. I marvel how they continue to change in character and tone. Never being quite sure who will arrive and in what disguise. A young woman eating lunch and reading in the afternoon sun becomes the teacher of friendliness and innocence. Two boys skipping along the aisles of the supermarket broadcast the sunny side up atmosphere of every ordinary task. Basking in the sun with a friend watching the waves create a symphony of infinite splendor and bravado. All at once I am reminded of how fragile and eternal this life is.
Come out, come out wherever you are and recognize the seamless shifts of scenery and sanctuary everywhere awaiting our witness stance.
Purpose resides in accuracy of perception and appropriateness of response. Nothing more may be necessary. So, too, the motion of the dance provides a vehicle for witness and wonder. The practice of souls in motion becomes a field of limitless opportunities to announce the song being sung in the choir of circumstance.
I console the jarring jaws of jumble.
I soothe the unwieldy promises of acquisition.
I pull up the covers and fluff the pillows of serenity and success.
I know that as the daily dance becomes unwieldy and nightmarish, that I can lay my head down and rest in the assurance of a breeze blowing and cooling the fires of frenzy.
Oh, life is sweet and death a dream.
Dream the dream of dreamers.
Be the dreamer.
Be the dream.
Vision the fictitious fabrications of separation.
Join the body choir to sing songs of celebration and unity.
I am motion. I am alive, I am alert, and I am enthusiastic.
Travel well…vinn